First, some good news: despite claims to the contrary spanning many decades, there have been virtually no substantiated instances of random trick-or-treaters being deliberately poisoned, dosed, or otherwise harmed by malicious tampering.

Naturally, that hasn’t stopped such tales from gaining momentum in the collective unconscious. They’ve been told so many times that they feel true, regardless of what common sense dictates, becoming another bit of exciting holiday folklore for kids to terrorize each other with — as well as an excuse for parents to paw through candy buckets and set aside a few of their own favorite treats for taste-testing.

This year- BPAL is doling out sickening sweets by the clawful, in the form of five perfumes inspired by the persistence of these perverse legends. We’ve turned master illustrator Drew Rausch loose in the candy shop to create the kind of appropriately upsetting label artworks that make this made-up danger seem absurdly imminent.

[These products are merely fragrances, and do not actually contain drugs, sharp objects, or harmful chemicals. Please avoid ingesting them all the same, just like all our other products! It would be most uncool of you to consume or otherwise abuse them.]